Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Being a mom!

I just need to say that I found this website called manicmommies.com I have been listening to the poscasts lately and they just reassure me that I am a normal working mother. So are most of you!!!! Sometimes I think that I am screwing up my kid by either being too strict, to lenient, not consistant enough, not attentative enough, etc. I have been reassured that everything I am doing is NORMAL!!!! All of my worries are NORMAL. Listening to these poscasts and reading the forums I feel like I am saying/writing this stuff.

I sometimes have such a feeling of guilt for working full time and having Owen in school full time. There are not enough hours in the day to get things done. I run around in the morning with my head chopped off trying to get us both ready and out the door. I try to add a cusion for time so I am not rushing him. If any of you have met my son you know that when he needs to move quickly he is a slug...lollygagging around, taking his time. He is just SLOW. Now when I need him to be calm and quiet he is NOT!!! Like any boy he loves to do the opposite of what I want him to.

Lately Brian has been picking him up from school around 3ish everyother day. On my off days I go to the gym after work. On my pick up days I get to school at 5:30. Once we get home Owen is crazy!!! He is just a ball of energy. Brian and I have to make dinner, lunches, do dishes, give O a shower, and be calm for bed. Inbetween these things I usually throw in a load of laundry or something. There is just not enough time in the day for all of the things that need to get done. I am big on Owen getting his sleep too! I feel like he needs to be well rested for the day ahead. He is playing all day!!! He needs his sleep.

So back to the podcasts. The two ladies who do the podcasts are working mothers. The stuff that comes out of their mouths cracks me up. It makes me realize that you dont have to be perfect or have a perfectly clean house. You dont have to devote every waking second to your kid(s). You just have to love them and be there for them! I know that Owen knows we love him and are there for him.

I just thought I would share because sometimes I feel like I am alone in my worries and concerns so I keep them to myself. I am sure plenty of people already think I am crazy, I dont need them thinking I am more crazy than I really am!!!!

Monday, March 23, 2009

Catching up

I have not been as good as I should when it comes to blogging. I guess I have not had the time. We have been so busy. Running here and running there. Busy is good but sometimes you need to just stop and relax.

Owen started swimming lessons three weeks ago. He is doing so great!!!! The first time he went was a no go. He didnt make it in the locker room. He was scared that he was going to sink to the bottom tf the pool. He didnt know what it was about. My child has a HUGE fear of the unknown. If something is new to him he is terrified of it. We had made such a big deal about it, talking about it for weeks, hyping it up and I think he was just overwhelmed. We did not want to give up on it though. So the next week I brought him a half hour early so he could see what it was about. He was so scared to even go into the pool area. After some talking to and watching he actually got into the water. He is still pretty nervous but he trusts his teacher (she is nice but does not baby them which is good). He trusts us when we tell him nothing will happen to him. I think I have learned not to really tell him what is going on. He obsesses about things and thinks the worst. Brian and I are the same way. Stay tuned for pictures. Now that he is getting comfortable I feel I can sit back and let the teachers teach and just watch. I will take pictures soon.

We have been trying to figure out what to do with Owen for kindergarten. It is usually an easy decsion to make...when your kid is 5 he goes to kindergarten. Well when you live in bridgeport its not that easy. We had planned on moving to Boston, living in a good school district, sending him to public school. Well since we are not moving everything has changed. We are not sure where to send him to school. We have looked into Catholic school and we are considering public school. Either one will be fine I am sure. My only reservation with the public school is the threat of it closing. Its been all over the news and I just dont want him to go to a school and half way through the year it closes. I guess it doesnt matter where we are or what school he goes to...it could happen anywhere in this economy. We shall see what happens. Who knew it would be so damn difficult!!!!

As for Brian and I, we are still adjusting to the idea of not moving. I was looking forward to the move and settling down. Now everything is up in the air. I am very thankful that we both have jobs. Dont get me wrong. I am just anxious that I dont know what is next. I have no idea where we will be next year and I dont like it.

I did a photo shoot this past weekend. Only I was on the other end of the camera. It was weird. I kind of enjoyed it but it was still weird. I am NEVER the one to get my picture taken. My friend needed a model and asked me to do it. I agreed.

It was a perfect situation. She wanted to do a trash the dress/bridal session. With my 5 year anniversary coming up I thought it would be a good idea to get pictures taken of me in my gown. I have known Melissa (the photograher) since middle school but have not seen her (in person) for 10 years. We see eachother everyday virtually (thats how it goes these days). It was so good to see her IN PERSON. She started her photography business a year ago so it was great to get to talk shop with her!

Here are just a few of the images from the shoot. They all came out soooooooo good!

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